Saturday 24 December 2011

Underneath the tree

ah christmas is here and our nostalgia flares up at a dangerous rate. but christmas means many things!
like:

food!!
i just spent a few hours in the kitchen making only the pudding (it has to be in the freezer for four hours). then there is the good old traditional leg of lamb roast and delicious salads. this year we have a bit of a greek feel by adding dolmades to our starters and baba ganouche (a purée of aubergine, mayo, garlic and roasted peppers) as a side. then the smell of baked potato's fills up the meal. finally that tiramisu (after it's four hours in the fridge) is ready and pudding is served.

carols
ooh another lovely tradition. every christmas eve we gather around the tree and sing our carols. deep voices, higher voices and some voices that really should rather not all blend into a surprisingly wonderful cacophony to praise the one who came for us (and if you don't believe in that stuff, at least to bond as a family, you know, spread the christmas spirit!!!)

gifts!
ah what would christmas be without the gifts. in our home, decorating the tree is a whole ritual in itself. each decoration has it's own story and we talk of memories long past as we hang each. then the presents start to appear, this year modestly wrapped in newspapers (we joined the green movement). already you can identify the annual christmas book i receive and the car my brother is going to get. mum will no doubt receive some bath essentials (soap or foam or salt) and dad cookies and chilli sauce. and so it has been and so it will be... for who knows how long?

ultimately, christmas is the event of the year that makes me feel old so much more than birthdays do. time flies when you sitting under a christmas tree <chopped from a peach tree>

Thursday 22 December 2011

Why?

ah the age old philosophical question... why?

recently i have been pressed to search within myself for why i do things. what is my ultimate motivation?
honestly, i have found that it mainly rests on acceptance.

many of my decisions are based on what my parents would say. whether they would like it, would want, would be able to be proud of it. ultimately it has made me choose between their dream and mine. i have not chosen for myself. and i begin to wonder when i will?

furthermore i do other things to receive praise or be "noticed". i am often labelled as a know it all, since i readily share knowledge. i only do this so as to see the face of someone's astonishment at learning something new and the feeling of knowing more. i use big words to hide my insecurities. i write and design and draw in the hope that friends, family or teachers will praise my work, making me feel like i'm worth something.

ultimately i am unable to sustain myself with motivation and thus quit quickly when i do not have an obvious solution. in a way i write this again to gain your attention, perhaps hoping for pity or comfort, or perhaps maybe admittance is the beginning.

Monday 19 December 2011

Something.... satisfying :)

there is just something incomparably satisfying in doing something for someone.

and thus when i read about an outreach programme that our church, NG Weltevreden, (OMG i just broke the no-no rule of religion...) had, i couldn't wait to join. even if i had no idea what we would be doing. so with a very vague description saying "Street party in Jan Hofmeyer, we leave at 9 o'clock" i arrived at church. good thing i didn't know what to expect...

so, Fourie (the coolest pastor you have ever met) picks us up in his landrover. which, might i add, has this problem that it never starts once it has stopped unless you use this can of quick start which you spray in the chocker and then force it with a screwdriver. i know... i wouldn't have been any help either.. >.<

on the way, we are briefed that we will be holding a party for the children of Jan Hofmeyer. This is one of the poorest neighbourhoods in our city close to JHB central and has a lot of single parents and orphans.as we reach our destination, we discover another difficulty: the strip of land that our "benefactors" chose is unusable because of the weeds and grass growing there, but also that it is three sizes too small and had no electricity. it looked like our party, was a no-go.

The giant dandelions that inhabited our initial field
which leads me to another problem. this outreach was planned by an attorney's firm (i will not name them, since i don't have the rights...). it was shocking that they had done such horrible planning. but fear not. thanks to our pastor's knowledge of the city, the day was saved. he organised a little field behind a preschool.

and so we set up our booths. a face painting stall, a series of hairspray stalls, some swingballs (game with a ball on a rope that is tied to a pole and you hit it), a jumping castle, soccer balls, and some swings. throw in a table at the entrance to give them sweets and BAM! we were in business. so the kids came and went, and we enjoyed ourselves painting faces and running and playing with them.
the paint we used...
my hair after they had ambushed me...










My face, done by my wonderfully talented friend alecia!










and so we played, we sprayed and we painted till it was time to come home. and i saw lots of little happy faces, and a few shy ones...

so i guess the message is simply that the satisfaction achieved from doing something for someone else, cannot compare to anything, and i hope that you will als be able toe experience it!

LOVE Y'ALL!
ME

Wednesday 14 December 2011

Addiction...

ok so i guess this sounds uber creepy and heavy duty. but jus gimme a moment...

it's clear that we all have addictions. heck, we all know about drugs and alcohol, or food and sex. but have you ever thought about your own addiction? i'm an avid watcher of Gossip Girl and can honestly say that i experience the worst withdrawals whenever i can't watch. or <heaven forbid> a season ends... and i would do pretty much anything for my dose!

and so we each have our junk. gaming, working out, smiling, love stories, books. the list just never ends

i guess the point i'm trying to make is that we shouldn't be so quick to judge others on their addictions. to each his own. rather than being a bitch, why not help them substitute the bad with something better [habits and addictions are pretty much the same things..]

so LUV Y'ALL!
Me ;P

PS: tnx marli en mia vir die idea!!!