Residual Grudges

When I was in the fourth grade we were given a project to do a presentation on our role model. It was the first project I ever did completely on my own and I was really proud of all the biographical information I was able to gather on my chosen role model, Jacques Kallis (who incidentally finished his cricketing career today).  I was really fluffing my feathers about my great mark when the next boy, Lian van der Lith, did his presentation on Nelson Mandela. To my absolute horror he did better than I did (this might have been the beginning of my whole Mandela issue in the first place).

Now this entire boring and traumatising story was related to explain to you a concept that I refer to as Residual Grudges. I still remember 8 years later about a guy that slightly upstaged me in painful detail.

I am a terrible victim of both Jealousy and Holding Grudges. Sometimes it even happens subconsciously or involuntarily. I will be jealous of something or someone and start feeling anger. This anger translates into a very cold attitude toward that entity and before you know it I can’t stand it and become all dark and dangerous in its presence.

And I really can’t think that I’m the only one who holds these grudges.

The problem comes in when I allow these grudges to affect my entire life and existence. I need to learn to consciously check situations for this jealousy and control it, so that I won’t keep destroying myself and my relationships.

And as we all know “Jealousy makes you Nasty, Nasty makes you Fat, Fat makes you Ugly and that’s a Fact”

Peace

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